That’s right! Despite the fact that the government is spying on people with Verizon cell phones in the US, and probably anybody in the US with a cell phone, I’m having a contest! 😀 I already did a version of this contest once, and it was so stooky, I’m doing it again. 😀

What to do: Write a story in the comments about my Fortune Wookiee and your favourite president, and tell me why they’re your favourite president. Then, I’ll pick my favourite story, and make the writer a contributor! If you’re already a member of Max-igami, I’ll let you choose what you want (with limits). The deadline for the contest is July 4th at 6:00 PM Central Time.

And just for fun, I’ll write a story about my Fortune Wookiee and my favourite president- Abe Lincoln.

Here it is:

President Lincoln was discussing the Civil War with his secretary. “I’ve arranged for a few people to come in and give you advice on how to win the war.”, said his secretary. “The first is a young boy named Max who apparently has a ‘Fortune Wookiee’ that can supposedly predict the future and give advice. It’s a cootie catcher that looks like some sort of bear wearing a bandolier.” “Predicting the future‽”, yelled Lincoln. “That’s impossible! I don’t have time to listen to the superstitious.” “He’s just a kid. You should give him a chance.”, replied his secretary. “Fine, but only for about 5 minutes.”

And when the time came, Max came. “I was informed you have a ‘Fortune Wookiee’ that can supposedly predict the future.”, said Lincoln. “Is this correct?” “Yes.”, stated Max. “My question for it is: will the Union win, and if so, at what battle?”, asked Lincoln. “Who’s your favourite president? You can’t say yourself.”, replied Max. “I don’t know what that has to do with your Fortune Wookiee,”, said Lincoln, “but I’d say my favourite president other than myself is George Washington.”

“Well,” explained Max, “Washington was the first president, so I’ll open and re-open my Fortune Wookiee just 1 time.” And so Max did that. “Now who’s your 2nd-favourite president?”, asked Max. “John Adams.”, replied Lincoln. “OK, then I’ll count J-o-h-n A-d-a-m-s across the flaps.” And so Max did that. He landed on a flap, and opened it. “Your fortune is… ‘Wuuurgh’.” “Thank you.”, replied Lincoln. Just as Lincoln was about to run back into the White House, Max got out his Han Foldo.

Han Foldo said, “Hello, Mr. President, I’m Han Foldo. I’m going to translate your fortune.” Lincoln thought he must’ve been hallucinating. “Your fortune means, ‘The Union will win. Robert Lee will surrender at Appomattox.'” Lincoln said, “Thank you.”, and went back into the White House thinking, “That kid must be crazy.”

Eventually, however, at the Battle of Appomattox, Lee surrendered, and the war was over. And so Lincoln always trusted the wisdom of the Fortune Wookiee.

 

Peace out, and May the Force be with you!

-SWF Max/GFF Max

 

 

 

 

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About Gravity Falls Fan Max

I'm a Ravenclaw, a Whovian (a fan of Doctor Who), a Graviteer (a fan of Gravity Falls), a Star Wars fan, a LEGO fan, a Minecrafter, a nerd, a Futurama fan, and a fan of The Simpsons.

4 responses »

  1. Super folder Epvjupa says:

    One day, Theodore Roosevelt was sitting in the White House thinking about how he was horrible at telling jokes, and that this disability could cost him the title of president.

    Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a boy flying through the air, and he almost spewed coffee. And the next thing he saw, the boy was right in front of him.

    The boy said ” Hello Mr. President, my name is Max. I’ve come to give you advice with my Fortune Wookie.

    And he pulled out what looked like an origami Chewbacca, from Star Wars. Now, Roosevelt remembered his problem, and asked the FW. ” OK, Fortune Wookie, how do I tell good jokes?”

    It was a strange question, and Max gave him a questioning look before asking him his favourite Star Wars movie, and he answered Episode V. The fortune Wookie moved back and forth five times. Then he was asked to name a Star Wars character, and he said Palpatine. Max pointed to each of the flaps and when he got to the end of Palpatine, the FW said, “WWWRRRRUUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!!”

    Max pulled out an origami Han Solo, and said “Why did the Wookie cross the road when the stop signal was on? A: Nobody crosses a Wookie without having their car flipped over.”

    Thanking Max, Roosevelt later told the joke to the other members of the Union. They loved it. And ever since, Max has been his secretary, constantly giving him advice for his problems.

    The reason I like Roosevelt is because I don’t really know any other presidents,by the way.

  2. Super folder Epvjupa says:

    By the way, Gravity Folds, on the EU, is now on 100 comments!

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